Wow another interesting day

Idk about anyone else but i definatly feel a wave like pattern in energy fluctuation. Rage to grounding in the unity of love. I finished a job early today and decided to see my friend E and all her animals since I was nearby. She has been one of the few people I feel can relate to me, even knows me better than me sometimes. She is anglo but connected to the Pnobscot,Wampanoag, and some Hawaiian peoples. She is twice my age and many times wiser. Lol doesn't take much, I've been so scattered my whole life. She called me a "light house" not soon after meeting. She has wands and brooms and channels nature spirits. Since a child she has had a strong connection with Gaia and nature. She has died many times like my self, and told me this will be her last trip around earth. I knew she would be one of the few people I could truly open up to, so I knew I had to see her. She retired a few months ago when she told me Gaia told her she's leaving earth soon. I didn't pay much attention then. I then proceeded to open up about how I feel like a warrior( idk if hes greek/native/ african anymore), she even brought up it could be my inner child and i ask her what she needs, raging at my own traumas, those inflicted on all first peoples of America, and those inflicted on Gaia. Telling her it feels like I'm in a never ending cycle of hell where we are blinded since birth, forced to perpetuate the same lesson, failing every time. Being manipulat3d by bad et actors, who implant fear and divisions. What she told me next blew my mind. She said the first nations knew 200 years before the Europeans showed up, what the result was... and mentioned if I felt the way I felt, I should consider the autonomy of their decision. Hard to accept, but I believe her. She also said the switch from matrilineal leadership, to patrilineal was accepted and the women put the men's words in the food. I told her how I felt about how suffering and love are really one and our senses are a lie. She doesn't hold the same view point, and believes the quantum nature of this is too complicated to use simple logic to understand and navigate decisions. She repeated to me all is one, all is love, humans are one of the few species capable of love, and that's a reason we attract so much attention. It was grounding and I almost felt like my idea of love is only achievable through suffering is incongruous with Earth, and that it can exist independently... made me think I truly in my spirit have an ethical code inherintly different from other people.

She leans more toward the its all quantum, but we have free will and essentially will the world around us. I don't disagree, but I have been feeling like free will is lesser than we think lately. I said all the syncronicities over my life feel like I'm simply being guided on a set path. She said I still have the free will to give them.attention or not, I agree and like that take. She deffinatly is feeling the time getting warped and the increasing overlapping of consciousness. I told her it seems like my personal.life is changing at a simmilar rate as the world around me. Made me think where headed for unification, not expanding with the big bang... truly feels like that to me. Anyway she reminded me that deep down our main purpose is to simply "being" love, evolving to greater levels. I left it there happily. She is awesome. I can't help feel like I have never experienced what some people call love, but not really missing it. I feel the unity, but idk if some people percieve love on earth as different. I really am just a child stumbling around, trying to learn when I just need to "being" centered. Really starting to feel.like again binary star separation yet connected to this universe. I need to learn to meditate properly, my mind is in flux. I will definatly need to see her again soon. Please let me know what you think.

Any way Love love love is one love is all

TJ